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Garbage in the streets and on the screen…


See DailyDose for this and other pictures of the garbage strike in Toronto.

And speaking of garbage, the other night I could not sleep and ended up watching some extraordinarily bad television. Bad televsion like good television is hardly news but this was worth a rant I thought.

First up was Groomer Has It. This managed to be both the ultimate reality show and a parody and travesty of the same. It had all the trappings including the camera swoops in on any of the frequent overwrought expressions that everyone displayed (all about as subtle as farts in an elevator). The title sought was Groomer of the Year, that is dog groomer.

Now I have nothing against the profession which is no better or worse than many others, but the tears and the drama, and the heartfelt stories of the struggle for the American Dream just brought the poverty of the genre into high relief. Check it out here at Animal Planet and watch Bill Dishes the Drama if you are a bulemic and just need to bring that last little bit up.

But as an actual threat to civilization came an infomercial for Dual Action Cleanse.

You may think I am overstating the danger but consider the potentially devastating ramifications if this particular conjob swept the culture. The infomercial consisted of our developer talking to a doctor about his product which was inspired by his young daughter’s rather voluminous product in relation to her size. He took this to be a sign that she was crapping as nature intended and that all droppings should be large. He also opined after lamenting the toxic world, with plenty of pictures of smokestacks spewing into the air, and trying to convince us that if we suffered from any of a million symptoms like fatigue, anxiety, weight loss or gain, aging, etc., that all we needed was more quality time on the porcelain throne.

The healthy way, which of course was best delivered through his product, was to not only have large shits but to have them at least twice a day, and at best, immediately after every meal.

Consider what would happen if everyone became a convert.

You would have to not only widen the pipes of the sewer system and install stronger flushing toilets, you would have to increase tenfold at least the stalls at any public eating venue. Banquets would require a company of portapotties available. Private residences, would have to include at least one bathroom per occupant. (Of course, this might necessitate a step backwards to the communal facility. perhaps the installation of pit toilets instead of individual seats).

This would be a boon to the adult diaper industry and having an accident might move from being embarrassing to being amusing or even a sign of superior health.

I don’t know but this obsession with the size and frequency of one’s bowel movements seems both regressive (to childhood) or narcisstic (same thing really as childhood). Could this be related to the over emphasis on nutrition and diet? Could this just be a consumer manifestation of a desire to not only eat better and bigger than everyone else in the world but also to take the fecal crown? Is this a symbolic, and only barely symbolic, shitting on the rest of humanity?

One comment on “Garbage in the streets and on the screen…

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